An Odd Life

 You are weak because the people who should be training you to be strong acted as your anchor when you should be using your backbone. The stronger muscles did not grow on you because they gave you fish instead of teaching you how to fish. People tend to confuse with saying YES to love when there are times when saying NO is what they need. Confused people with ruined lives and bad fruits. I wish to go away but cannot. May you rot in hell.

 If there is one thing I would wish is that my kids will not get my anger. My circumstances that made me really angry. People would not care about you unless they need you. People creates their own drama over other people's issue. They make it about them. 

I finally gave up. I vowed to stop giving. I told myself that no one will lift the trash but him. No one will cook but him. No one will wash clothes but him. No one will do everything but him. It has been years that things are thrown to my lap knowing that everything will be taken cared for. No one is asking if I can still take the burden. Everybody just assumed that I am fine taking all the dirt all by myself. Then they take all the credit. They get all the praises while doing nothing. I am just tired. I am giving up.

 I am so angry that my heart could not contain it. I burst at the simplest inconvenience. The littlest of a bad memory triggers me. So much anger. So much rage. I have been patient enough to wait for people to help me but they wont. I got tired and impatient waiting. Now I burst and really there is nothing that can be done about this. So much rage.